Respect Thy Parents

Respect Thy Parents

Kamnitnik, climbing wall, Slovenia

O.K. But there are some limits to this wisdom. Let me give you an example. A true story told to me by a young girl.

She: »I do not know how to say No. I try to please everyone, especially my parents. Every two years or so I end up in a locked ward of a psychiatric clinic.«

I: »We all have to learn how to say No in certain situations. Even to our parents, who took care of us. Respecting parents has a limit – the limit is the respect for ourselves.«

She: »But every time I try to say No, they tell me that I am selfish.«

This conversation went on and on and it seemed like she was trying to persuade me that there was no solution for her problem of »losing it« at times. I felt exhausted after our meeting.

Like I always do, when I try to persuade people that there actually is a way out and that this way is called ‘setting boundaries’. Yet this time there was something different. After a few hours she texted me: »Thank you for your advice.« In that moment I knew that there was hope for this girl. And for her parents. I am sure they are just trying to protect her and that they are not aware of the fact that they are suffocating her with their worrying. However, in my opinion, if she starts to act a bit selfishly and sets her boundaries, she will eventually help herself and her parents.

See my book for more on indigo children.

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