Emotional Coldness

Emotional Coldness

mushroom (Ramaria)

Some time ago somebody asked me about an emotional outburst and what to do about it. The person identified yearlong emotional coldness as the reason for the sudden state of being overwhelmed with sadness. I was asked for advice. Since emotional coldness is a very common problem in our Western world, I decided to share the basic outlines of my answer with you here.

In my opinion there is no use dealing with emotional coldness, unless we try to find its origin first. Let me name some possibilities of what the origin could be:

  1. Due to a traumatic event, one shuts down emotionally and this is not a conscious decision. It is an automatic reaction to a trauma.
  2. The trauma can also be from one of our past lives.
  3. If a child is born to emotionally cold parents, the child learns to suppress his/her feeling as well. Emotional coldness can even be a habit, running from generation to generation.

Consequently, talking about the past should help. There are many ways of handling the problem, from simple conversation to various meditation techniques like the Phyllis Krystal Method I have mentioned often in my blogs. There is no ‘best method’. One should find the appropriate one for oneself.

However, there is a point I wish to mention regardless of the method we use: if the trauma happened in early childhood, it might have gotten so deeply suppressed that one does not remember it anymore.

Phyllis Krystal pointed out in one of her seminars that sometimes the forgotten traumas should remain forgotten. It is not advisable to try to dig them out for any price, for one could have more problems with the re-known memory than just with the effect of the forgotten trauma. In this seminar the person in question told the audience that he managed to cut the ties to a childhood trauma, but it was not shown to him in the meditation (which is called Cutting of the Ties), what had actually happened to him in his early childhood. Phyllis advised not to dig any deeper. She said that our High Consciousness knows better than us, when to conceal the exact happenings. She considered the problem solved without the recollection of the trauma.

Similarly the Phyllis Krystal Method offers a way to cut the ties to emotional coldness as a learned behavior or as a habit that runs from generation to generation. You can read more about the Phyllis Krystal Method here: www.phylliskrystal.com

Take care and feel free to ask me any questions. You can ask them publicly below or send me and e-mail to info@helenasmole.com,

Helena Smole

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