I have discovered recently, that one of the most important things in life is to know what you want. If you do not know, what you want, you cannot get anywhere and usually it is everybody else’s fault. I gave notice at a well paid job six years ago and it has not been easy since then. Almost simultaneously with quitting the job, my husband and I also moved from the capital of Slovenia to a smaller town. I had to build everything from scratch: a new job, new friends, a new balance. A new job is being a writer. It is far from being simple. I am also the publisher, which means I have to push myself to...

I remember studying the French philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre in high school. What surprised me most about his work was that he talked about ‘the burden of freedom’. Back then I found it silly. I thought: ‘Freedom is a good thing.’ Today, in an era filled with abundant choices and in a world filled with commercials, I think Sartre was a visionary. One may not notice it at first, but freedom means one has to make many choices. And making choices takes energy. Just think how many choices we make, before we even get to work in the morning. How cold is it outside? Should I put on the very very warm...

A friend asked me not a very long time ago: »Did it not help you to hear from your friends and family that you are not fat?« I answered: »No, it did not.« Being a slim beauty, she was curious: »How so?« My explanation was as follows: »You see. It’s pictures that really get to you. You see them everywhere – the professional models. These pictures are very strong messages to our subconscious. Stronger than any words. We are being brain-washed since childhood.« She was appalled: »That’s horrible.« I smiled a most content smile and told her the secret: »But you can beat these...

When I was a child, my mother never bought me a Barbie doll. Still there have been more than enough images along the way that made me think I was fat. The thought got intensified when doctors told me to lose weight. I wasn’t really fat, only swollen from tranquilizers I was taking. I kept looking at the fatness of my bottom in mirrors for years and I always found myself fat. The subconscious, full of photoshoped images of models, would not accept the fact that in mirrors objects appear larger. I had a ‘panic attack’ every time they would not keep larger sizes of clothes in stores. The...

There is no point in hurrying, for one forgets half of the things to be done – in the very process of haste. Or one gets spilled over with hot coffee. What a waste! And please bear in mind that each individual functions at his/her own pace. Do not compare yourself with others. Life is not a competition with others, but only a competition with oneself. Even in professional sports, so I have read repeatedly lately (compare: Slovene top climber Mina Markovic, Slovene top skier Tina Maze etc.). Take care, Helena Smole, author of Balancing the Beast, a book offering a bright view of schizoaffective...