A Wish Less Is a Bliss More

Seeing advertisements everywhere one would think that wish fulfillment is the core of our lives.

A wish is like a blossom surrounded by spikes.

Looking around, seeing advertisements everywhere one would think that wish fulfillment is the core of our lives. And it probably is. We are bombarded with new ways of making our desires come true. There is not a place where one can be free from commercials except in one’s sleep. That is what makes it so hard to resist wishes, when we know deep inside we should give them up for our own sake. But that is not what people usually talk about, is it? Listen carefully and you will notice how much time we devote to telling each other about wishes. Little do we know that it is in fact the reduction of wishes, which leads us to happiness.

Let me tell you about my wishes. When I gave notice at work and became a financially supported wife, I thought this was just temporary and I would develop some kind of business myself. First I thought it would be giving private lessons of German language. But then I started to write in English.

When my first book, Balancing the Beast, was out in 2011, I was already calculating, how much money I could make off books. I wished to make enough money to pay for my pension insurance and my health insurance and maybe a few bucks extra just in case. I had this wish even though my husband was and still is making enough money for the both of us. I had been brought up to be a financially independent working woman and my subconscious was rebelling.

Balancing the Beast has sold over a thousand copies till today and I am proud of it, even though I cannot pay for any insurance with this amount. I no longer fantasize about being a business-woman.

In 2015, I published my second book: Vivvy and Izzy the Dwarf: A series about relationships (Book 1). I had this obsessive thought that I would sell no copies of this book. It was some kind of paranoia. But it proved almost entirely right. I have only sold one copy till today. And you know what? I do not care. Maybe I am writing for future generations, who knows?

I even wanted to stop writing, but I plod on. The stories are inside me and I have to get them out. I have no more wishes of success apart from keeping the sales rate of Balancing the Beast. And therefore I am free. What a relief!

Take care,

Helena Smole, author of:

– a fantasy novel with romance Vivvy and Izzy the Dwarf: A series about relationships

Balancing the Beast, a book offering a bright view of schizoaffective disorder ˗ bipolar or manic-depressive type

Leave a Reply